Update~
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Moving to Tumblr...Yeah :/
So I've discovered Tumblr (well quite a while ago) and like many others I'm just deleting this account. If you guys have Thinspo accounts I really wanna follow you, no follow back required, so leave your username in a comment below. Thanks you guys :) -
Do I look kinda Asian to you?
So my mom had me when she was 18 and I just found out that the guy who I thought was my dad might not really be my father. She says she had a small thing with this guy around the time I was conceived and she thinks I’m actually his. He’s Asian, she doesn’t know exactly from where though. My mom’s white and I look a lot like her, but I’m not convinced cause I don’t really see any Asian in me, but that might be from years of thinking of myself as half Hispanic :/
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Spring into Bikini Season!! Challenge :)
Totally signed up for this :) Click the picture to go to the official site. -
Great 6 minute Workout :)
When to the gym earlier and speed walked around with Veronica for about a half hour. I also just did this workout :) Haven't eaten yet today, I'm going to get a Gatarade when I leave with my aunt, but hunger's going to hit me later tonight so I think I'll get a Subway sandwich or a salad. Hope I stay strong ~♥
If you haven't worked out yet today, or even if you have, I challenge you to do this workout. I know you're probably just sitting there avoiding your homework or playing on Tumblr, so might as well use your time to get motivated and burn some calories :)
P.S. madifatti2x4.tumblr.com :) -
Always Tomorrow
I stand at the edge of a cliff, my bare toes curling over the rocks. Wind blows my hair forcefully around my head, first into my face, then behind me, my vision filled with swirling bits of brown and red like the in the fall. I look off to my right and from the corner of my eye I can see the sun lazily behind me circling like a cat, his skin glowing with warm briliance, getting ready to nuzzle in with Mother Mountains for the night. All I know are those mountains. Safe and protected from the rest of the world, I can see nothing but my own existance, my own little world made and kept in contentment. Familiuarity, comfort, predictibility, it's all there waitng for me to come back so it may embrace me again, hold me close for the night, tell me everything is okay, and watch over me.
I look back before me, down to the water far below. Together they move as one, gently sliding up the cliff side, caressing the rock and whispering sweet nothings to it, before retreating, the cat and mouse game of love they with forever play. The rock, standing firm and unmoving, must wait for the their love to back, trusting that each time they leave they will return. I follow the water out, far, far away, so far I can't even tell where it ends. Soon the water becomes reflection, and the reflection melts into sky, the dark blue and black universe sprinkled with the marvelous stars who love to watch themselves twinkle and shine. They dance and spin and leap for themselves, their florescent skin and hair captivating, they can think of nothing more beautiful than themselves, for they are proud creatures.
But the moon, the moon sees no one but the sun. She follows him, shy and nervous, too bashful to get too close she hides behind clouds when he looks her way. Sometimes she just wants him to notice her, to know she exists. Bright and strong and beautiful she shines in the night. But sometimes her faith fails her, she feels ugly and ashamed and hides from the world, unsure of herself.
It's on this particular night that she could be no more magnificent. My feet grip at the ground harder, my only ties to the world, and I feel my pulse beat in time to the earth. Something pulls me forward, telling me to jump, that I'm meant somewhere else. The wind pushes me forward, urging me as well, softly caressing to let me know he won't let me fall. Go. I tell myself, thinking my body will follow my mind. Just go. I stay rooted in place. Just watching the world darken, the temperture dropping. From behind me I feel a tug, it's getting dark, my world is going to sleep.
From my side I feel fingers lace in mine and a warm hand squeezing it reassuringly. "I'm here," she says. I knew she would be, she's always there when I need her. For a moment I feel as if I can do anything. The urge to jump rises in me again, and I'm sure that I'll do it this time. I hold my breath, my heart leaps, but my feet stay anchored to the ground, my body not even flinching. I feel alone again and I look down to find my hands laced together. She's not real. I have to remind myself. She never was. I let my hands fall to my sides and slowly sit down, my legs dangling off the edge. Tomorrow. I tell myself. I'll jump tomorrow.
This is a dream I've been having for a couple of years now. -
March Madness Challenge
So I propose a challenge to all of you. For the month of March pick one day a week to fast. Fasting once a week isn't going to hurt you. Fast to tell yourself you can do it, it might be that little push you need. The second part of this challenge is to do something, anything for at least 30 minutes straight a day. Dance, clean, go for a jog, yoga, anything that will get your heart rate up. Take your dog for a walk or chase him around the house, he'd love that. Pretend to be a kid for the day and get your friends together and play tag. Don't plan to do it later, if you're just sitting on here reading through Xanga posts get up and do something, cause later may never come and you'll just keep pushing it off. Set your watch, your phone, your microwave, or any timer for 30 mins and burn some calories. A challenge also to get you to drink more water; always drink a glass of water with every meal before drinking anything else. Have a glass of water with lunch, then if you're still thirst have a glass of milk/juice. Or better yet, have another glass of water :)
I started my fast today, since it's the first, nothing but water. Lots of water. Every time I get hungry I'm going to chug a glass of water. I also walked some today, not for a half hour, but I'm going to learn this dance when I'm done with this post.
Also, make yourself a "Candy" Jar. Find yourself a cute candy dish or jar, decorate all cute with some ribbon or paint or something, be creative. Then get yourself some colored paper or scrapbook paper and cut out 1/2 inch x 12 inch strips. Tie the end of each knot like it shows at the beginning of the video, then on each strip write a compliment, a pick-me-up, a motivation, a quote, a bible verse, or anything positive. Then fold them up like in the video, squashing the points to make the star shape. Now you can put these in the candy bowl and every time you get hungry, or feel yourself slipping, or are feeling down you can reach into the Candy Jar and remind yourself why you're strong :)
P.S. If you have not discovered StumbleUpon yet then you need to head over there and get yourself an account. That's how I found the idea for the Candy Jar. You will find so many cool crafts and ideas, good things to keep your hands busy so they won't snack.
Facebook You can add me on Facebook, I have over 1200 pics of Thinspo, plus quotes and other pics :) Thinspo, Thinspo, Thinspo, Thinspo, Thinspo, Thinspo, Food To Crave, Once Upon A Time..., -
[Day 11]
STATS
Age: 20 years old
Height: 5' 00" (153 cm)
Weight: 114 lbs (51.7 kg)
SLEPT: I have no idea :P
INTAKE
[BREAKFAST] 2 "dollar pancakes" with some random syrup.
[LUNCH] NONE
[DINNER] A salad with croutons, cheese, ham, and ranch.
[SNACKS] NONE
OUTTAKE
♥ Maybe some dancing.
DIARY
So I have discovered this wonderful thing called alcohol. Hahaha, I'm officially an alcoholic. So what's been going on is I'll go over to Dan's house with Jason and we'll drink, I don't know how much I drink cause I can't remember anything, I'm SUPER happy, I pass out, I wake SUPER happy, I go home, and for the rest of the day I feel just this side of nauseous so I don't want to eat till dinner, I eat a bit, and I drink again. I lost 4 pounds in two days, and right now I'm just maintaining, but I'm freakin' happy.
Stay Strong Girlies ~♥
THINSPO FOR THE DAY
I'm leaving currently to go to the mall with Veronica, but I'll put up Thinspo later today :) -
K-pop Dance Work-out ~♥
So as I'm sure lots of you don't know, I am a HUGE k-pop fan, especially Girl's Generation. The thing I love most about k-pop (Korean pop) is the dances :D They're so cute, can be easy to learn, they're fun, and they can be a great work-out. Plus Korean idols are GREAT thinspo (even if you're not asian). So I've compiled a few songs and dances that I use as a work-out. I'm thinking of maybe even making a video :)
Arms
Girls Generation - Hoot [English Subs]
Song Meaning: This song is about a girl who is sick of all her boyfriend's crap and so when he "shoots" his arrow (tries to sweet talk her into staying) she's going to "hoot" (laugh).
Work-Out: The chorus of this dance is popularly known as the "Robin-Hood Dance". It involves a bow-n-arrow move and most of the chorus involves raising your arms, and although it looks easy, once you do it a couple times your arms get sore. I know the whole dance, both the background version and the main singers' version, but all you really need to know for the work-out is the chorus, 0:50 - 1:22.
Stomach, Legs, and Cardio
Secret - Madonna [English Subs]
Song Meaning: This is a confident song about how they're Madonnas and they make everything hot. The refer to themselves as fashionistas, sexy icons, and Wonder Woman, but they are also calling out to the listeners to follow them and feel like they do. "With confidence, coolly, if you're always like that, you'll shine like a goddess, always like that, you're living just like me."
Work-Out: The chorus for this song is a great ab work-out. If you tighten your core while doing the shimmy part, you'll feel it. In k-pop the dance move that I like to refer to as the "Drop and Pop", where you bend down and immediately pop back up is awesome for your legs, especially in heels. This dance also has a lot of bouncing. You're arms also get pretty tired. I don't know this whole song, just the chorus so I'll freestyle most of it, but you still get your heart rate up. The chorus is right at the beginning :)
Legs and Cardio
Miss A - Bad Girl, Good Girl [English Subs]
Song Meaning: It's about a guy who judges the girl based on how she's dressed and how she dances. She's saying, I might dance like a bad girl, but I really a good girl. It's all about not judging by outward appearances. It's also about how he might being saying she's trashy, but secretly she knows he wants her so that's why he's saying bad things about her.
Work-Out: Miss A is a dancing group, which means all their members trained as dancers rather than singers, so they use a lot of ground work. I know all four of their parts and this dance is definitely worth learning all of, but if you want just the chorus, which has the ground work, then you should learn 0:55 - 1:25.
Miss A - Breathe [English Subs]
Song Meaning: This song's really easy, it's about when you have a crush on a boy and that feeling you get like it's difficult to breathe.
Work-Out: There's a joke going around that this dance makes you "Breathe". It is definitely a dance worth learning all of cause this is probably one of the best cardio dances out there. There are two different dances for the chorus; the first being the beginning, 0:05 - 0:40, and the second being 0:14 - 1:30. I know all four parts to this dance as well and I can't do it twice in a row :P
These are only a few, if you have any questions, or want me to post more let me know. I'll probably do another post soon though :) Also if you'd like to download these songs for your iPod go to ihoneyjoo.com Happy Dancing Girlies ~♥ -
[Day 7] More Personal Tips and Tricks + Personal Pics
STATS
Age: 20 years old
Height: 5' 00" (153 cm)
Weight: 118 lbs (53 kg)
Goals:120 lbs119 lbs118 lbs
117 lbs
116 lbs
115 lbs
110 lbs
105 lbs
100 lbs
Previous Tips and Tricks
Tip #7: Your level of hunger is directly related to your level of activity.
This may seem pretty obvious, but it never really crossed my mind for a long time. I would go for days where I wouldn't really be hungry and would barely eat anything, then (seemingly) out of the blue I'd binge and be so hungry. I felt out of control and I kinda lost faith in myself and let go of my diet, and ended up gaining weight. Then I realized something; the days I was crazy-sauce hungry were the days I did more. If I went to the gym I'd come back and a couple hours later I'd just go on a rampage. (I'm kinda guessing at this) But I think your body tries to maintain your weight naturally, so when you burn a ton of calories your body thinks it needs to replenish them. Knowing is half the battle right? So now that you're aware, if you weren't before, you can do something to stop those after gym munchies. And it's not just the gym, it could just be a busy day with lots of errands.
Tip #8: Your meals are probably backwards.
My whole life I have almost never eaten breakfast, I always woke up just before I had to go to school or on the weekends slept clean through till lunch. Lunch was always something light, a sandwich or a handful of shrimp poppers, and by the time dinner rolled around I was half starved to death. I'd pile up on meat, mashed potatoes, and bread until I was stuffed, bloated, and a little sick. Even as I got older it was still, a banana for breakfast, a small lunch, and a big dinner; but this doesn't make sense, why would you eat a ton of calories to go to sleep? You shouldn't.
It's time to flip your eating schedule around. Think of it like this; Breakfast (Breaking your fast from sleeping) should be a feast, Lunch should be a meal, and Dinner should be a large before-bed snack. Get on a schedule and your body with become accustomed to when you eat and you won't feel the need to eat randomly anymore.
A good quote from Dream High, "Eat breakfast like a queen, eat dinner like a beggar."
Tip #9: Stop thinking of weight-loss as a "challenge" and more as a life-style change.
There seems to be a mentality on here of, "I will just hold out on sweets and all the good things till I'm skinny." This is just going to make it harder to fight the urge to give into indulgences. Food is an addiction. You can not have your cake and be skinny too. You need to treat it as any other addiction, completely remove it and plan on never returning. You need to decided what's more important to you, eating that meat house filled with cheese-whiz, surrounded by potatoes, and sprinkled in bacon, or being flat, toned, and perfect. For a while I was like, "I'm skinny enough, I look really good with clothes on, I look pretty good with clothes off, and everyone always tells me I'm thin. I want to eat what I want, when I want." But then I decided that wasn't good enough. I wanted to be perfect, I wanted to be goddess. You need to make that conscious decision to never again eat certain foods. I don't eat donuts. They're not a treat, they're not a reward, they are off limits.
Tip #10: Be proud of EVERY victory.
When you stare down that Snickers bar in the check-out at Walmart, but leave without it, that's a victory. When you didn't lose any weight, but you didn't gain any either, that's a victory. When you walked out of your way to take the stairs instead of the elevator/escalator, that's a victory. When you ate more than you had planned for the day, but it was all healthy food, that's a victory. The more victories you have the easier it is to make better choices.
Tip #11: Don't be ashamed to want to lose weight.
Now a-days everyone is making it okay to be fat. It's not. I agree with the stance they're trying to take; to be comfortable in your body and love who you are even if you're not perfect. But there is NO excuse for people who sit around all day, live off of junk food, teach their children bad eating habits, and then have the audacity to call out those of us who want to be thin, referring to us as shallow. Being thin is like any other area of perfection humans strive for. It should not be wrong to want to be pretty and skinny, I think it's ridiculous. Yeah, it's kinda a downer when all someone thinks about is their weight, but when you ask someone why they ordered a salad for lunch and then get on your high horse about how they're beautiful are and how they should just accept themselves for who they are you're just being stupid.
I think it's time we start educating people that no, eating crap all the time is not better for us. That we don't have to have a bad body image to want to be thin. That the need to back up off!! I don't get questioned about my eating habits anymore, I've made it clear that it's none of their business what I eat, how much, or when. I don't agree with eating disorders, but it's my understanding that they have deeper, underlying reasons behind their struggles. I think it's offensive to people who have to live with that burden everyday to call everyone anorexic or bulimic for watching what they eat. I tell people that when they refer to people as anorexic/bulimic that aren't even remotely close to that that they're A. Giving attention whores what they want, and B. Making ED's seem less severe than they really are.
Sorry that kind of just turned into a rant rather than a tip :P
Let me know what you think about these. Agree, disagree? Anything else you want me to talk about or address?
Here's a treat for reading ~♥ It's one of my Facebook albums cause I'm too lazy to go through and save, upload, and paste pictures :P There's 200 in that album. Feel free to add me, I have over 800 pics and counting :) [*It doesn't really seem to be working so I might upload some later :)]
Personal Pics
Side Views
Front View
My Legs
I tend to push my fat away so I can see about what I'd look like skinny. My left leg (your right) is the skinnier one :P
I pretty much only have a problem with my stomach and thighs... And my butt's huge. I just need to burn them fat!! Fighting~!! -
[Day 5] Personal Tips and Tricks :)
STATS
Age: 20 years old
Height: 5' 00" (153 cm)
Weight: 120 lbs (54 kg)
Tip #1: Don't stress.
Whether it be cause you've hit a plateau in your weight loss or cause you have a big test coming up, don't let anything eat at you. According to MedicineNet.com
[Edited] "Excess stress can manifest itself in a variety of emotional, behavioral, and even physical symptoms. Common physical symptoms include sleep disturbances, muscle tension, headache, gastrointestinal disturbances, and fatigue. Emotional and behavioral symptoms include nervousness, anxiety, changes in eating habits including overeating, loss of enthusiasm or energy, and mood changes. It is also known that people under stress have a greater tendency to engage in unhealthy behaviors, such as excessive use or abuse of alcohol and drugs, cigarette smoking, and making poor nutritional choices, than their less-stressed counterparts. These unhealthy behaviors can further increase the severity of symptoms related to stress, often leading to a "vicious cycle" of symptoms and unhealthy behaviors."
Stress can also cause problems with acne. So next time you feel yourself getting over-whelmed just try to shake it off. Making yourself sick isn't going to help you any and might actually work against you.
Tip #2: Surround yourself with food that's good for you to eat, and you WANT to eat.
If you live on your own it's a great opportunity to fill your fridge and cupboards with healthy snacks and foods. Before going to the store plan out what you're going to buy. You can even go as far as to plan out meals and snacks for the week/month. This can also help you save money as you can check the papers for sales, coupons, and plan out a budget. I also make a NO EXCEPTIONS!! list (cookies, chips, bacon, etc.) so I can't talk myself into buying temptations. Try to avoid "easy" foods and shop along the outside of the store where all the fresh stuff is. Stock up on fruits and vegetables for snacks, these also provide you with the water you need for the day.
If you live with your parents, or someone else who does the shopping, ask to go over the shopping list with them. If it's someone you can't stand, like my mother, you may just be better off buying your own food or giving them a list of things you'd like and hoping for the best.
Tip #3: Snacks.
If you're like me you feel like you're hungry all the time, when really you're not. Keep pre-made snacks ready for when you want something to munch; fruit and dip, fresh cut vegetables, and yogurts. If you have a sweet tooth keep it healthy, but indulge yourself a little. If you cut out all those fatty, processed sweets and switch to more natural sugar you'll find that if you binge you don't hate yourself as much. My favorite is fruit; fruit in yogurt, fruit with cream cheese, fruit even by itself, or for holidays when you know you're going to cheat, fruit in chocolate, fruit in crepes, fruit in shortcake cups, or my favorite~ Saeng Cream Cake!!
Also, remember to keep snacks with you. A baggy of your favorite healthy cereal, a tupperware of baby carrots, a smoothie (Green Machine ~♥), and when you drive by those golden arches or walk by the vending machine at school you'll have the ammo to fight off those cravings.
Tip #4: Dance with no pants.
I know one of the biggest things I had to over come before I stopped binging and eating like crazy was myself. I remember not looking at myself when I stripped to get in the shower, wearing a t-shirt and pants to go swimming, and just being disgusted with myself. Then one day I decided, "Screw this! I'm a sexy beast!!" I started hanging around in my underwear, slowly I stopped being ridged and just got used to it. Then I started just chilling naked (lock your doors) and now I have no problem with my body. Yeah, I want to be skinny and have a tight body and a flat stomach, but I'm still pretty sexy how I am. (P.S. Sex is way better when you're not worried about your body and you feel like a Sexy McGee ;D)
Tip #5: Be realistic.
I know you want it now. You want to just not eat and go to the gym for six hours and shed all your weight in one week. You calculate your calories, your intake, your outtake to lose the most amount of weight in the least amount of time. If you do this you're just setting yourself up for failure. Come to the realization that it's going to take time. I recently made a huge change in my diet; I cut out pop, I cut down on meat and dairy, and I try to avoid processed food. After a while I found I was craving a nice salad with all the toppings, an omelet full of vegetables, and water, lots of water. For a while I forgot about my diet and just lived my life worrying about other things, and when I stepped back on the scale I had lost 8 pounds.
Also keep your body type in mind. I am five foot nothing and white. I will NEVER have "spider legs" or a long, thin torso. I may never have a body like the Korean stars I idolize, and I'll never have wide, "baby-bearing hips". I'm just going to have to work to get to my own perfect body. And remember, somewhere out there someone wants your legs, your fingers, your arms, someone out there wants to be you just like you want to be someone else.
Tip #6: Dance.
Dance when you're in the kitchen, dance your way down the hall, dance when you're waiting in line (who cares about the weird looks you get?), learn a new dance, dance in the shower, just keep moving. You'll burn more calories than if you were just standing there and it's way fun. I'll be doing a post after this one all about dance, so look for it :)
A treat for reading through (or scanning :P) all that :)
You can add me on Facebook, I have over 800 pics and counting :) -
[Day 3-Finished] ♪♫The moral this time is girls make boys cry♫♪
STATS
Age: 20 years old
Height: 5' 00" (153 cm)
Weight: Didn't check
*I decided I'll post my measurements if they change, same with my BMI.
SLEPT: All day
INTAKE
[Breakfast] Half a package of ramen with some beef.
[Lunch] None
[Dinner] None
[Snacks] The rest of the Oreos.
[Drinks] 8 oz of Green Machine (~♥), and 2 glasses of milk.
OUTTAKE
♥ None
DIARY
I literally didn't do anything all day. I woke up, checked my Facebook, and went back to sleep. Woke up at like 6, went to Scott and Jenny's to babysit the kids, napped pretty much the whole time, and went to sleep at 10. Really hoping to do better tomorrow.
Stay Strong Girls ~♥
THINSPO FOR THE DAY [NINA DOBREV]
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[Day 2-Finished] ♪♫All my life I've been good, but now, I~'m thinking, "What the hell?
STATS
Age: 20 years old
Height: 5' 00" (153 cm)
Weight: 118 lbs (54 kg)
Ethnicity: Mostly white / South American
BMI: 23
Bust: 33 in (84 inches)
Waist: 27 in (69 cm)
Hips: 37 in (94 cm)
Thighs: 21 in (53 cm)
SLEPT: about 8 hours
INTAKE
[Breakfast] A crepe with syrup.
[Lunch] Beef and rice.
[Dinner] Half a package of Ramen with beef.
[Snacks] 5 Valentine's Day heart cupcake things, and a ton of Oreos.
[Drinks] 24 oz of Green Machine (~♥), 2 glasses of milk, and 4 glasses of water.
OUTTAKE
♥ Danced some
♥ Walked a bit
DIARY
I didn't really do anything again today. Bailed on the gym... again. I keep getting eight hours of sleep, but when I wake up I'm still tired. I sleep pretty much all day till 4 then I had to get up and go over to Jason's so he wouldn't be a 5th wheel with Steve and his girlfriend, who is hella annoying. I got hungry at one point, but since we were watching a movie I kinda slept through it and then later at 11 when Jason got hungry I didn't really feel like eating and only had a little ramen. I keep sleep eating, I finished off the package of oreos. Now that they're gone I don't really have to worry anymore though :P
Stay Strong Girls ~♥
THINSPO FOR THE DAY [EMMA WATSON]
*I would just like to point out I am REALLY upset she cut her hair -.- Yeah, she's still really pretty, but I miss her hair :/
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[Day 1-Finished] ♪♫Let's Be Friends So We Can Make-Out♫♪
So today is the official start of my attempt to lose 20 lbs. I'm going to be posting about what I'm eating and doing, and recording my progress. I'm mostly just going to wing it and make changes as I go, but I'm also going to set challenges for myself. I'm not going to set a deadline or anything, we'll just see how it goes :)
STATS
Age: 20 years old
Height: 5' 00" (153 cm)
Weight: 119 lbs (54 kg)
Ethnicity: Mostly white / South American
BMI: 23
Bust: 33 in (84 inches)
Waist: 27 in (69 cm)
Hips: 37 in (94 cm)
Thighs: 21 in (53 cm)
SLEPT: about 8 hours
INTAKE
[Breakfast] Omelet with cheese, green onion, celery, broccoli, red pepper, tomato, and chicken.
[Lunch] Salad with lettuce, cheese, tomato, bacon bits, carrot, cucumber, and chicken. With Italian dressing.
[Dinner] None
[Snacks] 5 chicken nuggets from Wendy's before breakfast, About 12 Oreos, and 3 Valentine's vanilla cupcake hearts.
[Drinks] Some Sprite, Chocolate Milk, a glass of water, and a little bit of Green Machine (~♥)
OUTTAKE
♥ Walked around the store for about two hours.
DIARY
So I was all planning on spending most the day at the rec center. I wanted to go workout for a half hour, go to a Power Tone class for an hour, go swimming for a half hour, then shower, get ready, and go to yoga for an hour. My sleeping schedules been really off and I've just barely started being awake during the day so when I got home from shopping with Veronica I kinda laid around and talked to my mom and aunt, and then crashed at 5 :/ I didn't really do anything all day, except go to Walmart where I got stuff for a chocolate truffles recipe for Valentine's Day and while I was there I got a package of Oreos and a box of the Valentine heart cupcake things :) Valentine's is my favorite holiday and I'm not even going to TRY and not eat treats during it, but I'm going to try and manage the amount I eat. I think eating all those Oreos is what made me sick so from now on I'm not going to have more than 5 at a time.
Stay Strong Girlies ~♥
THINSPO FOR THE DAY [EMILY OSMENT]
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Holy Crap It's Been Forever
HW: 125 lb.
CW: 123 lb.
LW: 113 lb.
CGW: 115 lb.
GW: 99 lb.
So I've been major hard-core binging again. I think it's out of fear that every time I eat may be the last time for a while. Last night I went to Walmart and bought my meals for today, then ate a shit ton. I had 6 McNuggets, a McDouble, a salad, and cold stone icecream, two Like-Its. Pretty much what I've been doing is not eating all day till I can't stand it then eating till it hurts (sometimes throwing it up cause I make myself sick) and then not eating the rest of the night. I think that's why I've been maintaining my weight and not gaining any (THANK GOD!!), but I need to start shedding some of this fat. When my stomach growls and I feel completely empty I can turn side-ways, suck in, and see just how close I am. Besides my butt, which is huge. And my arms and shoulders, I have lots of muscle up top and it makes me look like a tranny :/ My need to feed is on high right now. I constantly think about food, I'll hit up different places all the time and just eat. The worst is at work though, I work at a hotel and there is just food everywhere. I get so over-whelmed sometimes that I'll eat people's scraps, or off the top of the garbage, or off the floor. I'll just eat off the queens and I'll just keep going till I have to go throw it up, then I'll come back and start all over again. I'm sure people know...
Well, I just wanted to update, I might be back on more, but I don't know. It's up in the air :P -
Friday Intake/Outtake
Weight at the Beginning of the Day: 118 lb.
INTAKE
♥ Bananas and Cream Oatmeal
♥ Handful of Grapes
♥ Half an Ear of Corn (with butter and salt)
♥ 1/2 Pack of Ramen
♥ Raisins
♥ Crackers
♥ 3 Slices of deLITE pizza
Water: [♥] 8oz. [♥] 16oz. [♥] 24oz. [♥] 32oz. [♥] 40oz. [♥] 48oz. [ ] 56oz. [ ] 64oz.
Fiber: [♥] 5g. [♥] 10g. [ ] 15g. [ ] 20g. [ ] 25g. [ ] 30g. [ ] 35g.
OUTTAKE
♥ Gym
♥ Swimming
♥
♥
♥
Cardio/Fat-burn: [♥] 5min. [♥] 10min. [♥] 15min. [♥] 20min. [ ] 25min. [ ] 30min.
Heart-rate: 160
Weight at the End of the Day: -
Mom's Advice for the Day: "Poop twice a day and you'll be skinny!!"
While this sounds kind of ridiculous, she was referencing fiber and I think she has a valid point. I found a website that says that Asians consume, on average, 3x more than Americans. The amount of daily fiber you're supposed to have is 20 to 35 grams, but Americans only eat 12 to 15 grams, which is the fiber intake of a 7 to 10-year-old. An important thing to remember when increasing your fiber intake though is that when fiber moves through your digestive system it absorbs a lot of water, which means if you're going to add more fiber to your diet make sure you're drinking more water so you don't become dehydrated. Here are some sites with information on fiber:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dietary_fiber
http://www.wehealny.org/healthinfo/dietaryfiber/fibercontentchart.html
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/fiber/NU00033
I'm going to start marking off my daily fiber intake as well as my daily water intake.
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Monday Morning
Okay, so everytime I stay at my grandmother's house I always end up having this spazz-attack where I'm craving something, but I don't know what it is so I just keep eating. It wasn't so bad last night since I got kinda sick, but I still ate crap I shouldn't have. But on the positive side I drank a good amount of water (which is usually what I have the most difficulty with).
INTAKE
♥ Chocolate Covered Donut
♥ Handful of Grapes
♥ A Package of Graham Crackers
♥ A Small Slice of Meatloaf
♥ A Small Potato (with sour cream, butter, and cheese)
♥ Cheesy Cauliflower
♥ Some Salad (with sesame-seed dressing)
♥ Some Veggies
♥ Small Amount of Smoothie
♥ Small Amount of Homemade Icecream
♥ Some Brownie Mix
♥ A Pancake (with syrup)
OUTTAKE
♥ Walked to Grandma's (20 mins. up hill/mountain)
WATER
[♥] 8 oz.
[♥] 16 oz.
[♥] 24 oz.
[♥] 32 oz.
[♥] 40 oz.
[♥] 48 oz.
[ ] 56 oz.
[ ] 64 oz.
Yeah, my outtake didn't NEARLY make up for my intake... Well today is going to be good :D Lots more water, some fruit for breakfast, and we'll see how it goes. Not to mention I'm probably going to walk home. Alrighty then.
Over the Internet Double High-Five *clap clap* / <3 Madi -
Sunday Afternoon
So yesterday I did REALLY good :D If you want to read about everything that happened check out my Personal Blog. But so here's my intake and outtake :)
INTAKE
♥ 1 a sandwich bag of Frosted Mini Wheats (throughout the day)
♥ 1/2 a cup of soup (80 calories I know)
♥ A biscuit
♥ Water
OUTTAKE
♥ 20 minute hike up hill
♥ 3 1/2 hours of digging/pulling/chopping
♥ 20 minute hike down hill with tools
I weighed myself this morning and I'm back down to 119 lbs., where before I was 121 lbs., so 2lbs. (of water weight probably, haha). Anyway, I'm doing rather well today as well. Mark brought home donuts for breakfast, which is okay, I had one :) It was yummy. Then I got ready and drank some water to hydrate myself, had a handful of grapes, and then walked to Grandma's. It takes me about an hour and it's up a hill/mountain (we live on the side of a mountain, but it's all paved so it's more like a hill). On the way I drank two bottles of water, so about 35 oz.? Let's see how much water are you supposed to drink a day? 2 quarts which is 64 oz., so I'm half way there for the day :) Alrighty then.
Over the Internet Double High-Five *clap clap* / <3 Madi -
July 24, 2010 (Morning)
So yesterday didn't go according to plan. I had some grapes like planned, and some cheese and ham and crackers, which was ok, but then everyone started eating and I totally pigged out.
INTAKE
♥ 2 Handfuls of Grapes
♥ 8 crackers, ham, and cheese
♥ 3 bowls of Cap'n'Crunch/Reese Puffs
♥ Ramen
♥ 2 Handfuls of Frosted Mini-Wheats
♥ 1/2 a sandwich
I'm not counting calories anymore cause that just makes me too stressed out, but I weighed myself and I'm up to 121 lbs. :( I have an awesome outtake though :D Me and Veronica are building a campsite and we've been chopping and digging all last night from like 6:30 pm to 9:00 pm and then again this morning for 3 1/2 hours. My muscles hurt and I just rubbed down with Icey-Hot :) We're going back again soon and we have to hike for like 10 minutes to get there so lots of good exercise :D Plus I'm going to walk up to my grandma's to get my bike and then ride it back down, so there's some more outtake.
OUTTAKE
♥ Building Campsite
♥ Hiking
♥ Hour Walk
♥ 1/2 Hour Bike Ride
Alrighty :) Over the Internet Double High-Five *clap clap* / <3 Madi -
Update ~ July 23, 2010
Alrighty :D So today is going to be a good day!!! I'mma go weigh myself real quick, I haven't eaten yet today... 119.5 lbs. That's good, I haven't changed for a couple days :) My immediate goal is to lose 4 lbs. so I'll be down to 115, once I stay at 115 for 2 days (to see if I'm really losing weight or if it was just "water weight") then I can move on to 110, wait 2 days, go to 105, 2 days, down to 100, wait 2 days, and then finally move to 95. Just for anyone that doesn't know, I'm only 5 feet so 95 lbs. is the bottom of my "normal" range for my BMI, but we'll have to see how I look and feel at 100. I'll probably go down then back up and have to find my perfect weight, but it's mostly about what I'll look like versus how much I'll weigh, but I think that would be nice to say I weigh only 95 lbs., but then people will throw a fit cause anything under 120 is "skinny" (even though 125 is where I start becoming overweight) and anything under 110 is "anorexic", which is an extremely rude thing to say. Anyway, I'm aiming for 5 lbs. every 10 days, that includes the 2 day "wait period", so it should take me ... *does math* 5 x 10 = 50 days. So by
Mile Stones
♥120 lbs. ~ July 23, 2010
♥ 115 lbs. ~ August 2, 2010
♥ 110 lbs. ~ August 12, 2010
♥ 105 lbs. ~ August 22, 2010
♥ 100 lbs. ~ September 1, 2010
♥ 95 lbs. ~ September 11, 2010
So that means I will be skinny for SM Town Live 2010 and I'll reach my goal for my birthday :D That's perfect!!!! Speaking of SM Town Live, tickets go on sale TOMORROW!!! So excited, but I need $400 dollars and I don't know how I'm going to get it... But I'll find a way :D I've been practicing the Miss A song Bad Girl, Good Girl and I thought I was really good, but I recorded myself and I don't look so good cause of my fattiness :( But that's okay cause I'mma get skinny!! :D Anyway, the plan for today is, eat some grapes for breakfast, clean (so my mom stays happy), eat some more grapes for a snack, drink TONS of water, walk to the Rec Center and work out for an hour, go swimming for an hour and half, maybe two hours, then walk home, eat some more grapes, take a shower, get ready, and then we'll see what else is going on today. Alrighty :D
Over the Internet Double High-Five *clap clap* / <3 Madi
